in 10 years time,

'In 10 years, I wonder who is still going to be by my side.'

- @gloful

Many epiphanies and stings often occur in places and times when you least expect it. A decade from now, no doubt there'd be changes in my life, but I wonder to what magnitude these shifts can be. Will they be physical movements where I find myself in a new environment, the company around me refreshed in the way I haven't even met them yet and won't till years later - the company that will make the biggest impact to my life. Will I run into a missed connection on some of the quietest afternoons, making awkward eye contacts 3 times before we approach each other to say hi, igniting a newfound kinsfolk that we never knew once was possible.

In a decade, or somewhere along the tangent, will I still be intoxicated with millennial remorse and quickly wearied by the banalities of life, feeling powerless on how eruptive the heart is, allowing it to lead the head when it wants to take the leash. As and when it wants to. In due time will I master more control in not throwing the wagon in first?

I think some people fear the future not because of its bleakness, the infinite possibilities that mimics the countless stars that freckle the skies, but the gutted fear that even down the rabbit hole on the other side, life shall remain the same in purgatory, like playing checker stuck with one last move, refusing to make it knowing how it's no more different than throwing the white flag in.

'Have faith and keep your prayers close to you' they say, but singing a tune no one wants to hear can make you feel more helpless and trapped than feeling like you're screaming through a soundproof glass casket.

Ten years is a long time, but some days I fear it'll pass by without me noticing and I'll continue to feel just the way I am now.